I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
