I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
