Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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