I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
