i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
