I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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