Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
