You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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