So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
