Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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