I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
