I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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