So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
