ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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