Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
