I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
