I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
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