He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
