I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
You took a bar mat shot.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
