It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
