can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
