I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
