Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
