The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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