today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
