And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
