there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize