i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
