OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
You made out with two different species that night
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
