We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
