Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
