did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
