hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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