i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
