I bet he comes in French.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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