guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
