I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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