508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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