Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
