508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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