oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
