This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
