Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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