Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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