Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
