ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
