I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
