Well apparently he's into motor boating.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
