yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize
