I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize